I finally returned to bed in the wee hours.  Around 5:30 or so, my husband woke to my tears and held me until I could breath easier.     Less than two hours of sleep before taking the kids to school.

I prayed to be humble, kind and strong enough to detour any negativity from them this morning.  I half succeeded.  It’s ok.

My job as their mom is to always point them to Jesus and to teach them how to become who God intends them to be.  It’s not always fun and positive.  My son is amazing.  Truly.  He is ranked first in his class and can be the sweetest young man.  Still,  his positive  qualities do not make it acceptable for him to constantly disrespect the time of others.   His excuses are those of a toddler, not a young man, surely equally annoying.

Ths entire generation of teenagers and young adults is scary to me, including my own.  The “why me” and “this is not fair” mantras sour my own attitude.  That is completely my fault and my own sin.  I admit it:  there is a part of me that would just want to smack a ruler across their hands or wash their mouths out with soap.  I don’t and won’t.

In these moments, even deprived of any real sleep, I have to smile that He would take time to speak to me so clearly this morning.

 

Thank you, Lord, for always doing what is right and fair, even if I am being the petulant child.  I love you.