The Last Republicans at the Table

From time to time, old “notes” on Facebook pop up in my memories. This one popped up three days ago, August 20, 2024. I woke in extreme pain and read it around 5:30 in the morning. I returned to bed, as I was supposed to be off work for the day. We had an employee emergency which forced me to work. In between God using Sweet Futina to heal my back and closing the shop at 8:00 in the evening, there were countless Godversations. In this moment, I am being directed to copy that note over here in honor of the Conner Godversation which lasted nearly five hours. Not to honor Conner, but to honor how God used words the Holy Spirit helped me to write in the thirty minutes after my daddy going to heaven. It is so clear to me that on this auspicious “birthday in heaven”, I must do my God-Directed best to retain the words given to me at that time.

Thank you, God, for all you have done, continue to do and will do in my life. I remain overwhelmed in the best of ways. I love you. For any unspoken requests on my heart, I entrust them to you.

___________________________________________________________________________________________

Tuesday afternoon, I had a powerful visit with my daddy in the hospital. I can’t find where I wrote about it, but I relayed the details to Chrissie, Bryan, Vix, Fred and Pam. There was love, light, grace and clarity in those hours. It was just me and him. Mike had picked up the kids for me so I could be there. I shared the details with him when I picked the kids up that night. A rare hug was shared between us. I know I shared with two people that his hug, in part, gave me the strength to get through yesterday. If my ex-husband can be Jesus to me without even knowing that’s what it meant to me, that is powerful.

I got a call yesterday morning telling me to come to the hospital. We were all there together. That’s all that matters. In that call, my older sister told me that late the prior evening, my dad asked my mom “Shelia, do I embarrass you?” Sparing his dignity, I will just say that cancer, chemo and such can certainly leave that question open to many interpretations. Mom replied, “Oscar, what are you talking about? No, you don’t embarrass me.”

In delirium, split realities, or maybe something else, my daddy replied to her, “because we are the only Republicans at the table!”

I don’t care about your politics. Daddy was a proud, stubborn and staunch conservative. And, hearing he had spoken those words made me laugh. Out loud. Those I shared it with also laughed. Julie and I found several other moments to laugh together. Like, remembering when her son was born. Wesman was a hairy little monkey, according to my daddy. But, he had told her something to the effect that “Julie, I was hoping you would have a girl so you would know what you girls have done to me. I wanted to come running down this hall with a black, leather miniskirt and a can of hairspray for you!” Julie can tell it better. It’s one of her Daddy memories.

Before they finally kicked us out last night, the last really funny thing happened with one of the doctors. He came into my daddy’s ICU room with his face mask on. Neutropenic precautions. I think that is the word on the sign. Regardless, in a rare moment of lucidity, he barked at the doctor…

“Don’t come in here looking like a terrorist!”

I will say that I have peace after my visit on Tuesday. I had more peace after leaving the hospital last night. Daddy had a cute little red headed nurse during the day. Tamara. Nose stud. I felt a hug from Vix and Court when I noticed her stud. I digress. Daddy loved him some red headed hotties in the 44 years married to my mom. Anne Margaret, for one.

Moving on. I met his night nurse at the 8 pm visiting slot. I asked her name, she told me it was Christine. I told her we appreciated her. It was only Julie and I in the room with Daddy. I told her my daddy served our country for 23 years, Viet Nam, etc. I told her she was taking care of a hero. She said she got chills. We talked of how she allows patients overnight guests, where some nurses do not. I said, if it was her dad or your husband, you would want the same. She smiled and agreed wholeheartedly.

I dug deeper. I don’t know why. Well, maybe, I do…but it won’t make sense here.

She shared her husband had died six years ago in Iraq. Deeper, I dug. I asked his name. it was Joeseph Bellavia. He was ambushed outside of Carbola with a Lieutenant Colonel.

She shared his last name, and hers, still, meant, literally, “Beautiful way.” I hugged her, she started to cry for her own loss…perhaps overwhelming gratitude to speak of him as her own hero.

My last words to her were that she had just given me chills. I whispered in her ear, “It is comforting to know Daddy will have a “beautiful way” on his way to more beautiful ways.

Christine Bellavia started nursing school with the support of her husband before he left for Iraq. She just graduated nursing school last December. She is in the ICU at Clarksville Gateway Medical Center. I don’t have the address, I’m going to ask you to google. If you have it in your heart, I would like for you to honor my hero, as well as hers. Even two simple sentences…but send her a card. Write it on a post it. A piece of notebook paper. That part does not matter. But, it would bring me some joy to know that she realizes how much she has made a difference.

Help me thank her for all her beautiful ways. Or not. I just know that it would mean more for my father to know another hero was honored than to have more flowers at his service.

Walter M. Oszczakiewicz, Retired Army Major, husband to Shelia, father of Teresa, Carol & Julie, Grandfather to Kyle, Wes, Blake, Morgan and Leah. A great man. Our hero. He went into that good night an hour or so ago. I hope he went gentle and with peace. I will miss him.

“and the likenesses I now find most notable…are not the hair and eyes which could be altered…but the qualities and character existing inside…which truly make me my father’s daughter…from the closing stanza from my poem to him on his 50th birthday.

I AM HEALED

Sister Futina,

I thank God for you and for sending His Helper thru your hands in your healing prayer declaring the blood of Jesus over my entire back being “out”. Our visits are almost always late Friday afternoons. Today was the third time you visited “off your normal planned schedule. “Smiling to read my one-minute devotional and share it.💜✝️💜

The first time he sent you early was the one Friday , I had to leave early. I gave you the prayer journal page for that day. This was in February, I believe, before your grand baby arrived in March.

I will need to check my journal to see what was going on the one Saturday you brought me flowers. I think that was the second you visited “off schedule”. In this moment, I can’t recall. I remember God was moving and I was knee-deep in Deuteronomy.

Today, I will remember forever. I could never forget this date. Today was the third time you have visited off schedule and it is a Tuesday…a weekday you have never visited before. Again, I was not supposed to even enter the shop today. I was scheduled to be home and off work the entire day. THIS DAY, the one marking my daddy in Heaven for fifteen years.

Only an employee emergency could have changed our plans today. Well, we both know God can and will make everything work according to His purpose for us. Again, look at todays One Minute with God devotional I sent earlier. Planning. God must surely chuckle at us children. 😇

I showed you Mark’s post-it note about praying for me all day. Immediately, you held me and prayed in the Spirit. I must write down that detail about the post-it note. Something about His power displayed only through genuine prayer.

Sister, I praise Jehovah-Rapha for answering your prayer for healing my back. I praise God for revealing something to my heart when your tongue was claimed by the Spirit. Please know it was magnificently bright, beautiful and POWERFUL-FILLED.

It will be exciting to see what He does with what was revealed. I am so glad I told you about Mark saying “it will be fun to see what God does or why He wants us at the two shops today.”

The power of healing the physical ailment is surreal. I have never felt anything quite like it. I am testifying to every person who enters my path today that Miss Futina prayed over me and I AM HEALED!

I praise Jehovah-Jireh for providing you the discount on your tire and all the ways God is providing for you in this current financial situation.

The chill bumps are STILL on my arms two hours later. After your visit, I have enjoyed a long Godversation with another brother in Christ. Remind me to tell you his story of being healed for one day- and learning to pray “more clearly”. I am sitting here in complete awe and gratitude. So grateful you prayed in perfect harmony while calling the angels to fight for me.

I love you. 💜✝️💜

Plumb Line

Driving to work today, I had four or five things in my head that I knew I needed to write out. Two have been percolating all week and three came to me in dreams. As is my habit, I chit-chatted with Jesus all way to the shop. There is no better way to prepare for any day, especially our 11-hour long Mondays and Thursdays. Pulling into the parking lot, I said “first fruits,” out loud. It’s like I heard myself saying it as if I was repeating what I had heard. Either that makes sense or it does not. Either way, I am supposed to include it here.

Clearly, all the good stored up in our hearts comes from the Master of the Universe. The plan given to me to write “Legacy of Love” or “Amazing Love” feels like a God-Directed inspiration. Still, none of it would be possible without Jesus as my plumb line. So, the first thing I write today must be how the Holy Spirit used an old post of mine earlier this week to set my heart. The word for the week is PLUMB.

Exactly one year ago, I posted a flip to Amos 7:7-8. Facebook memories showed me the scripture and my notes a few hours before meeting Kim and Dawn for lunch a few days ago. The study notes immediately caused me to think of the house three doors up from our which has an entire outside wall collapsing. While I wouldn’t wish that stress on anyone, I found it interesting that God gave me a physical, tangible example so close to our home to keep as a powerful image on my heart all day. It applied to human relationships as well as the mechanics of proper construction. As I drove the 1.5 hours to meet them for lunch, I considered the “hyped-up Carol” who met them with Marcy for lunch a few months ago. I prayed to be steadfast in perfect peace with my sisters-in-Christ and to have ears to hear, as my overexuberance months ago could have negatively impacted Marcy.

Our neighbors home

In the same breath, my notes about our own home reminded me of getting Mark onboard with painting all our ceilings, walls, cabinets and upgrading our guest bathroom when he returned from his birthday trip last year. For context, doing all of this in the thirty days prior to leaving for Italy was a ton to ask of a spouse. Suffice it to say, we just hung a mirror and two paintings this past Sunday and have been discussing how we need God’s help to bring order from chaos. This past week, Mark and I have prayed more often together, beginning with praying for Jason’s drive to the funeral. Thank you, Jesus, for the powerful testimony of Edward Sassano. Thank you for his entire family and the reminder to write a separate post about them and the Vitality of the Holy Spirit.

Ultimately, when I believe the Holy Spirit is putting a word or topic on my heart, I google whatever word that may be and the phrase “in the Bible”. I believe it prevents me from being misdirected. I just figure if God really is putting a random word in my heart or mind, I will look that word up in His Word. Worst case scenario, I learn new scriptures and the Holy Spirit uses every bit of it beautifully. I knew Amos 7:7-8. The punch in my spiritual gut this morning is studying Zechariah. Zechariah was such an encourager and yet his people killed him. I have study notes in Matthew 23:35 which remind me that he was the last martyr in the Hebrew Bible. Gut-punched, indeed. Thank you, Jesus!

Zechariah 4:10 (NKJV). ” For who has despised the day of small things? For these seven rejoice to see the plumb line in the hand of Zerubbabel. They are the eyes of the LORD, which scan to and fro throughout the whole earth.” Oh, I see exactly what He did there, because there is conflict in my life when I get too excited about what others may perceive to be “small things.” To me, there is no “small thing” when it comes to God. Just like Joyce telling me about John with Tribe Trucking delivering the “missing food”. He is in every detail and literally holds EVERYTHING together! (COL 1:17) Zechariah’s vision was seeing God’s people being filled with the Holy Spirit and his heart was to encourage the Israelites. It was an angel of the Lord who told the prophet to not despite small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin. Baby steps are perfectly acceptable as long as they are aligned in His Will. In this moment, I am remembering conviction from Haggai and “get to work!”

Isaiah 28:17 (NIV) I will make justice the measuring line and righteousness the plumb line; hail will sweep away your refuge, the lie, and water will overflow your hiding place. Nutshell for me: There is only ONE PERFECT CORNERSTONE and those who reject that stone will be punished. 2 Kings 21 teaches us the mistakes of Hezekiah, Manasseh, Amon and the people of Judah. The seven lessons on how to avoid backsliding are paramount. Pretty sure I am to note these scriptures and move on to the heart of the matter.

Much of the past two weeks have revolved around working through communication issues with various people in my life. Simply put, we can all strive to do better, and I am working on my shortcomings. Perhaps my biggest challenge for over 55 years has simply been reigning in my excitement over any number of things. I have been this way my entire life. I finally accept God made me “this way” for HIS PURPOSE. Sure, it can hurt my feelings, but inherently, I understand enthusiasm can be a positive or a negative. Just because He made me this way doesn’t mean He wants to leave me this way. I am starting to see my character as the toolbox God gave me. Not every “job” requires every “tool”.

There are two sides to every coin, like anything else. I have always been super-curious and gobble up knowledge like it’s trail mix, or something. The Good Lord has blessed me with a brain which can process a copious amount of new information and learn whatever it is He wants me to learn. I get amped up and excited every time the Holy Spirit is moving so clearly. To me, beauty is meant to be shared, period. It makes sense to me how I MUST share the power and beauty of the Holy Spirit. However, it now also makes sense that not everyone can process the same amount of information. I have been guilty of overwhelming more than a few people. I welcome this new direction and invitation to be still and to wait well. Since getting the Dwell Differently verse in January, Romans 12:12 has come to heart with piercing conviction, several times. “Carol, THIS is why I physically lowered your blood pressure for two months.” Yessir, I get it. Take a deep breath and make it digestible.

Today is my childhood friend’s birthday. Miss Marcy wrote so beautifully six years ago about how her Daddy taught her about plumb lines as they were laying the foundation to a new home. Knowing it was her birthday this morning, I had to search her Facebook for the word “plumb” to find what she wrote. Somehow, each word was even more beautiful today than it was six years ago. She wrote how her daddy would specifically say, “the plumb line must be perfect, and you should check it often.” Brilliant! The truth is simple. We ALL get off course in our lives. We all make mistakes. If we are constantly checking ourselves against THE PLUMB LINE and CORNERSTONE, we will grow into deeper spiritual maturity and be less likely to fall out of His Will for us.

Thank you, Jesus, for my friend and her relationship with you. Thank you for making all the visits go well on Tuesday and for all the other blessings, too. As I count down the five days until my own daddy’s 15th Birthday in Heaven, I treasure the memories of helping my dad install the drop ceiling in our basement on Kimberly Drive. I am beyond grateful for you, my PERFECT PLUMB and PERFECT LAMB…and for every breath you put into my LION LUNGS. You know my heart and what I am praying for without me writing it out. This is one time I will keep the details between us. I love you. You already know I ask for anything in the name of your perfect son, Jesus, and every drop of blood He shed for me. Amen.

P.S. Even AI on Co-Pilot reminds us “even small steps can lead to great outcomes. In the context of faith and perseverance, it suggests that God’s work often starts quietly and grows over time, ultimately bringing about rejoicing and fulfillment. ”

Double Nickel Dross

The manager of Ingram Spark self-publishing was in the shop yesterday. Given the events of the past few months, it’s interesting to me that our Godversation is being used to clarify obedience required on my part.

The Good Lord gave me a list in late January of many big things He has done in my life. I began writing them all out, knowing there were at least a few digital files somewhere from writing a few of them out on MySpace decades ago.

I wrote crazy-fast and furious for one month. Then, God physically slowed me down for two full months with oddly low blood pressure. I read yesterday how God can slow you down, just so you are NOT in a particular place at a “normal” time. It stuck with me, as I said essentially the same thing when I was moving at a snail’s pace. It is exponentially challenging to be forced to slow down in that way. It was also necessary for growth.

This morning, as I drove the back way to work, I realized “Double Nickel Dross” was not only an easy title to remember, but it points to the reality of what God did in my 55th year of life.

Shattered Glass

This isn’t exactly how I would prefer to get back to the business of writing things down.  In fact, I have been thinking on this for a week and had a completely different path on my heart. Still, this is the place I am in in this moment.  It is only fitting today’s One Minute with God for Women is about Righteousness in Romans 1, 3 and 5. 

First things first, I am grateful for so many wonderful reminders how much God loves me. I am beyond grateful for the ways He has clearly moved in our lives, especially mine. Thank you, Lord, for getting me through the insanity of the past week. I am not going to write it all out here. Suffice it to say, my mother shared information with me last Tuesday which has taken a toll. Everything which “added on” over the course of a week felt like little evil trolls attacking me with a dull knife. I shared the details with my daughter yesterday, as we were working to complete her move. One thing I know is clear, sharing honestly with at least one other human aids in making everything better.

Hours into the moving of things, I suffered an accident. In short, I was carrying up a glass tabletop. Halfway up the first set of stairs, condensation formed quickly over the cold tabletop in the heat of the day. It became too slippery to move my hands and ended up breaking on the seventh or eighth step. Glass shards sliced open my left elbow, damaged my hand and cut my right pinky deeply on the inside.

It was ugly and a literal bloody mess.  I understood why my sweet daughter was concerned.  Life has taught me to get into solutions instead of remaining in problems.  My solution was for my daughter to drive to the closest Dollar General and grab some super glue.  I even spoke in a calm, clear voice, encouraging her that I really was okay.  It worked perfectly! 

What was NOT perfect was my response to learning she had texted someone specific about my accident.  I owned my mistake and explained WHY it is my preference to not involve others unless necessary. 

My sweet friend from middle school reached out for prayer today, as did Assisi Elizabeth.  While I do not know exactly the situation for Miss K., I know Elizabeth is getting another round of special chemo treatment in Florida the next few days.  Praying with and for her since last October has been a beautiful experience.  Today, she WhatsApp’d me that I am her favorite “stranger friend.”  Ours is a sweet, intentional and spirit-filled friendship. 

In this moment, my heart is heavy.  Sadly, it’s heavy over a different relationship in which I have been diligently working to improve communication.  Instead, a phone call unraveled in such a negative way, it’s left a mark on me deeper than the laceration on my left elbow.  My spirit is not settled.  Legitimately and logically, all I sought to do was genuinely make EVERYTHING EASIER for EVERY PERSON, not just one of the four in consideration regarding this specific situation. 

Lord, I desperately need to pour out my heart to you. I know you always hear me and know the condition of my heart. I know I don’t even need to have words, much less the “right words”. Thank you for teaching me that lesson so vividly. Thank you for the encouragement of Andy and Tommy on Season 19 of The Amazing Race. Of all the “training videos” we have watched, their faith has mirrored our own the closest. It was no mistake we watched this particular episode with Mark’s dad and uncle yesterday before I went to help my daughter. As much as I love Andy’s Proverb, it was a huge Godwink to hear Tommy quote 1 Thess and for your spirit to remind me of Romans 12:12. Oh, the beauty and grace of “waiting well”. You know what I need without words. I ask for it in Jesus name and every ounce of blood He shed for humanity. Amen.

Amazing Everything

Over the weekend, my husband and I decided we are going to apply to be on The Amazing Race. It would be fun to be Ambassadors for Christ around the globe, together. I am not sure what finally moved my husband. I shared with him that I had calculated less than ten percent of all contestants have been 50 or over during the filming. I also pointed out a few teams we have watched, like the Duphiney Brothers and the Pollacks. Between us, we have so many different skills and talents, it would be a blast! Thinking of how to present a three-minute audition tape is fun, too. Feeling like a bonafide cheerleader, this is what I posted extra-early on Facebook:

Despite all of that excitement, people will forever excite me even more. Yesterday, I had three extra-special visitors to the shop. My sweet lifelong friend, JoJo, came to visit in the early afternoon. We had such a great conversation about how our friendship trees get pruned and how we serve as examples for our children. Miss Wendy popped in during that visit and it was really good to hug her, despite not having an opportunity for a meaningful Godversation. Finally, Miss Futina popped in just before 7 pm to share my prayer over her was answered.

JoJo brought me a beautiful smooth stone with a cross etched in it. She reminded me she still has the silver toned “laughter” rock I gave her decades ago. Wendy gave me a much-needed hug from her heart. Miss Futina brought me a heavenly candle. I told her she must stop bringing me presents, as I have the bird/cacti and the last flowers still at the shop! She told me she simply HAD to see me FACE TO FACE when she shared her daughter and granddaughter have moved home with her! She said “your prayer” was answered. In that moment, I knew I needed to remind her that we prayed, IN AGREEMENT, out loud and TOGETHER. I do so love encouraging others, especially those who really need the reminder their voice matters.

Futina and I had a wonderful Godversation, as always. I shared that I am still knee-deep in Deuteronomy and only up to Chapter 29. I was not surprised to learn Deuteronomy and Revelation are her favorite books of the Bible. She asked me how I knew Revelation was her second favorite, as it came out of my mouth a half second or so before she said it. I told her I didn’t have a clue and reminded her we know the one who does. Overall, just a very sweet and meaningful exchange about being grateful for the things we don’t often think to express gratitude.

Thank you, Lord, for all you are doing that we fail to recognize. Thank you for bringing Futina’s daughter and grandbaby Jaylee home. Thank you for all your provision and protection in all our lives. Thank you for helping our business this week, too. We love you. Today, I ask for special dispensation for sweet Elizabeth in Florida. May she have peace and joy with whatever the oncologists shared yesterday. I ask this in the precious name of Jesus. Amen.

Deuteronomy

Yesterday, I spent the bulk of the day in DEUT 4-DEUT 17. I shared a pinch of it with Joyce, Pam and Mark. Since we discussed my DEUT DEEP DIVE Wednesday night at dinner, I sent this to Joyce.

Since I wrote my notes in a steno pad yesterday, I am working through on online study of DEUTERONOMY here at the shop. Imagine my joy to read “my summary” of my study yesterday within their text:

“Because of their lack of faith and obedience, forty years were spent accomplishing what should have been accomplished in only eleven days. Hopefully, we do not reach the end of our lives and realize that much of it has been wasted because of disobedience.”

My summary also included the “forgotten blessings” of the Israelites. For example, in DEUT 8:4, he reminds the 70 or so, “Your clothes did not wear out and your feet did not swell during those forty years.” Food, water and shelter are necessary and were clearly provided by God. So often, we all fail to give thanks for past and even current provisions.

For example, when we were blessed with our current home, I reminded my husband of how we thanked God every day coming down the stairs. My husband smiled and said he was directed to thank God for his vehicle recently. He followed it up with joking about how I fell down the twelve steps two years ago.

Yes, thank you, Lord, for NOT letting me stumble!

Whether we laugh or cry, it is always good to share what we are studying and how it applies to our daily living. We can ALL benefit from increasing our gratitude, praise and worship!

Unable to get Pam on the phone, I messaged her. Suffice it to share, her response included many challenges they have between a broken mower, no water and fire damage repair. it’s clear to me God did not want us to talk. He wanted me to share His Word.

I also shared with my husband my new appreciation for the way Moses repeats the facts, something which once caused me issues. As a parent, I understand the value of repetition. Thinking of Moses, I was diverted back to the sibling rivalry he shared with Aaron and Miriam in Numbers 11:35-12:16. His patience for 40 years in the desert and another 40 in the desert could only be explained by God’s very real presence in his life.

Today, I am focused on listening to my favorite helper and ensuring I am on Kingdom-focused tasks. When “Country” visited the shop today and shared his mother had passed, I could feel the weight of the world on him. I was nudged to run out to his vehicle and share something kind about him from another customer, Heide. She thought the “red-headed bearded man” was attractive. While she didn’t wish me to share several weeks ago, I trusted the Spirit and shared the loving thought. He was genuinely grateful and uplifted by the exchange. Whether he and Heide ever become friends or anything else is not up to me. Still, it was rather sweet showing him her photo with her ginger kiddos and his response about his own seven-year old ginger headed son.

Thank you, Lord, for continuing to use me as a catalyst for your purposes. Thank you for ALL the provisions and for keeping your promises. I pray you reveal to me anything for which I have not yet acknowledged gratitude. Thank you for “worshiping and worshipping” and letting that be an inside joke between us. I love how I hear you and understand you better in your Word. I could never thank you enough for letting your son, Jesus, die for our sins, especially my own. I ask to be convicted of that which I may not know in His precious name. I also ask for the protection of Psalm 91 for Ed, Rod, Katrina, Elizabeth and Heide’s daughter. Amen.

Katrina and The Waves

Miss Katrina has been back in twice since the last time I wrote about her returning for a second visit in one day. Today is Thursday, May 23, 2024, and she shared personal details about her family. The girls are 14 and 21; the oldest attends SCAD to draw story boards and things of that nature. The long game is to create sequential art or do something in anime. Her husband is both French and Jewish by birth. Katrina is 51. We have long since sorted out our deeper spiritual journeys were started 6-7 years ago.

Today was a deeper dive into abandonment issues caused by absent fathers. I shared about my dinner with Joyce and my DEUTERONOMY DEEP DIVE in progress. Thank you, Lord, for putting it on my heart to suggest Miss Katrina can honor her own boundaries, while allowing the possibility of letting her girls meet their maternal grandfather. Such boldness and conviction only come from you. For all you do, have done and will do in my life, you know I am forever grateful. Thank you for showing me how to truly love others in word and action.

Katrina sees His Light on me. She told me she also sees it on Lane, her banker at Pinnacle. I shared that after our last extended Godversation, it was clear I was to study Deuteronomy in entirety. Today, she mentioned that Lane had studied and deduced Solomon was in West Africa. While I have touched the basics of Alkebulan (Africa), there is so much more to learn and understand. His time, not mine.

To that end, Wednesday nights are the best time to enjoy $9.99 sirloin specials at Legends Steakhouse. Joyce and I agreed saving $16 was a blessing, as the sirloins are normally $17.99! Truly, it was a wonderful Godversation, breaking of bread and sharing REAL BREAD. Our Bible Study group was canceled because Terri’s dad isn’t well. Then, I scheduled time for Brandie that night. She had to cancel for work. So, it was really divine timing for us to be available in the same window of time.

I asked Joyce to look at the website she had sent me to deduce how she felt seeing the images. I don’t need to share them here or say anything negative. I am just acknowledging we were in agreement about the images and tuned into the same shared spirit. Rather than divert any more energy to the “dynasty” or “Harfouche” tangents, I am thanking God for feeding me the best things this week. When I think of all I have learned since Wednesday night, I am overwhelmed in the best of ways.

God is good all the time.

Roots and Wings

This morning, I looked at old Facebook memories from this date. I shared the awesome ones with Mark before sharing the sad memory of losing our tri-colored piece of heaven last year. That said, the understand that my husband does not connect to dates the way I do with my children. We all miss our sweet beagle girl, Sunny. The posted memories flooded my mind and spirit with many thoughts.

Driving to work, the Good Lord returned me to the subject which has been somewhat nagging me for two weeks.

Commercials on the Christian radio station felt extra-long in duration. I wanted another song and pressed the scan button to go the next station. Typically, it’s another Christian station. Today, it was a country station and Mary Chapin Carpenter singing “I feel lucky today.” I took a little clip of the song playing and sent a love message to Cassie in Louisiana.

Since I am at the shop, I immediately looked at my One Minute with God devotional for the day. God’s response is always scripture. Today was perfect. The first verse of the first Psalm. “Oh, the joys of those who do not follow the advice of the wicked, or stand around with sinners, or join in with scoffers“, indeed! The current culture of so much “scoffing” is bringing bile to my mouth.

While there is no “location or time change” evident in this post, I am now at home. My husband relieved me at 3:00 and we talked until I finally left around 4:15. As he was arriving, Miss Katrina and I were concluding our second Godversation of the day. Miss Katherine also visited today. Just so I don’t forget, her last name begins with my first initial and is the name of a president. Miss Katrina returned just as I was finishing a chat with Katherine. She told me was compelled to return because there was something she was meant to share with me. I am not sure how long we were talking, but I would guesstimate an hour or so. She shared about Kumbaya meaning “come by here” and how it was engraved in Hebrew on the backs of the pews in the first black churches. She shared so much more, but that is for another day.

What matters most is the plethora of topics broached with Katrina were all familiar to my husband. I had zero qualms sharing the depth of the conversation, despite my lack of knowledge. My husband is one of many who would confirm that this is not how I typically behave in my flesh. Instead, it was all somehow peaceful and exciting to share in the same breath. Only the Holy Spirit has that impact on me.

It’s very clear to me in this moment why the Holy Spirit sent Katrina back to me today. This is bigger than “sunshine” or “hurricanes”. The “quotes” are key words which will remind me of this day.

Thank you, Lord, for sending me one of your angels today with Katrina. Thank you for redeeming me and this process of sanctification. Thank you for your promises and your provision. I am so much more than grateful, but I know you know the depth. I accept your invitation to deep dive into Deuteronomy with a “new lens”. As humbled as I am, please plant YOUR TRUTH and YOUR SPIRIT into my heart as I open your Word. I ask this in Jesus’ sweet name. Amen.

Dear God,

Thank you for waking me early enough on a Saturday to ride along with Joyce as she ran errands today. Thank you for planting Psalm 91 firmly in my heart before she picked me up. It’s super cool that the images attached to the commentary reminded me of the aurora borealis last night.

I love how you speak to us through your Word, teaching us new things as we grow. Thank you for your Word, the master decoder of all my thoughts. Thank you for ALL the music you have inspired and all the ways you have moved, are moving and will surely move.

There is none like you, Lord. You are literally the Master of the Universe. Holy, Holy, Holy.

Hallelujah!

I am so grateful you know the praise comes forth from the depths of my soul. As much as I didn’t enjoy the diversion last week, I thoroughly enjoyed praising you through the “NAR STORM”. Years ago, I wrote that I was grateful for my GPS…as you know, that is your Perfect Son. It would be impossible to NOT praise you and worship accordingly. Still, today, I am bringing this “NAR Quagmire” to you and seeking direction. You keep leading me back to Matthew and Luke, weighing my words carefully.

You already know how broken my heart is for all which breaks yours. My heart has long since been yielded to your will for my life. Sometimes, I stumble. Sometimes, I fall. Always, you are there to pick me up and redirect my steps. I could never thank you enough.

The ugliness being expressed against Bethel, Elevation Worship, Jesus Culture, Maverick City, Hillsong and more is not being expressed with sincere love. You know my heart. You know I look for the love. I have sought you in every article, blog and video condemning them. I have NOT found you in a single one. I know you love them and need your instruction on how I can love them better.

For now, Lord, I will continue to dwell in your shelter and your shadow. You are my refuge, my fortress, my strength, my redeemer, my everything. Thank you, in advance, for commanding angels to guard me. Thank you for sending your son, Jesus, and for every drop of blood he shed at Calvary for me. It is in His precious name I ask for direction. Amen.