Woke in tears and ended up laughing. The tears were for many and the joke was between me and Jesus. Thank you, Lord, for my husband’s willingness to let me rest this morning.
Yesterday, I posted this note from 15 years ago on Facebook. Very much nudged to “share some silly joy” and break from the heavier lessons He was teaching me
Given the intensity of the past ten plus days, I should not be surprised with the “Jesus Joke” this morning.
It is well documented here that I am listening to the Holy Spirit redirect my testimony to become more mature. Every day last week, I was given another breadcrumb. Each breadcrumb is confirmation and encouragement to BE STILL for the next.
In obedience, I shared the silliness and joy. This morning, Jesus is basically thumping me on my shoulder, smiling, “Ha Ha! You did NOT see what I did there.”
Thank you, God. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Holy Spirit! You heard and answered prayers to guard my tongue. You directed the excited utterances all day yesterday! You humble me so sweetly. I love learning everything I can about you.
The image on my heart is my daughter twelve years ago. She taped her own mouth, joyfully.
Yessir, I was one of your happiest children yesterday. I will be today, as well, with your help. Thank you for showing me how you see me. With the utmost honor and gratitude, I will now add “Nicely played” to the list of phrases I use to acknowledge YOU are in my heart during a conversation.
This image also reminds me of many years prior and Morgan “changing up” your prayer. I no longer see an error, but the blessing. Instead of saying Thy Will Be done, she said “Thy WILL be dumb”. Everyone at that meeting laughed. It makes every person you send me in recovery smile. I see what you did there. I see it far clearer now, thank you.
Thank you, Lord, for the wee hour awakening today. I see what you did there, too. WHAT? Oh , that’s just how my Jesus makes sure I keep feeding His sheep. Let’s get to work!
In wee hours, I was responding to messages. It is uncanny how certain revelations were born from things I learned in and around “Eric Sins” . We are both praying for restoration of a certain father/son relationship. So much more to expand upon, but God is bringing so many different types of soldiers into my life.
There is another I would like to share. However, there are Biblical reasons for me to make that entry in my handwritten journal. It was a dance which seemed to build up and be cut short. Today, I see it even more clearly. Thank you, Lord, for guarding my tongue.
Father God, you have me in the palm of your hand. I believe you are speaking to her quite differently, just as every relationship is different. It makes logical sense that our relationships with you are all different. You know why I begged for you to send your angels. You heard what I just prayed out loud. In your Timing. In Jesus Name. Amen.
Amicable Arnell spoke to me like Jesus today. First person I saw at the shop. He poured out such encouragement in countless ways. Thank you, Lord for Arnell and his heart. May it belong to you.
The Uber driver brought Crystal and Mo here from the Nashville Rescue mission. What a blessing to help their mission! I met them for the first time not even a half hour before they texted back. They received the encouragement from YOU, beautifully.
Brother Zion is always so kind and jovial. I asked his name today I just said, “brother, forgive me, I have forgotten your name if you have shared in the past”. When he said “Zion”, I raised my right arm and said, “I see you what you did there”. I confidently told him there was NO DOUBT his mama was in The Word. He said, “oh YES!” He shared about his pastor and another man he enjoys learning from, Paul Washer. Noting it for when the time comes to be reminded Zion sent me here.
The floodgates rushed in during extended testimony from Zion about prophecy, demonic warfare, sleep paralysis, standing in the gap and more. This brother needs to go to Texas and a certain home church or find one here. So many are struggling to connect with earnest seekers of the TRUTH in THE BIBLE.
When Zion shared the story of his godmother and the two sons living with her, I could not control sobbing. The mother stabbed her autistic son to death before shooting him. That is not in the paper, linked below. Also not reported is how the mother appeared like a demon in his room before the older son escaped. Mike is the older son and told Zion all of this within a half hour of the murders.
The demons oppressing her tiny cancer consumed and frail body were supernaturally strong to pull such a large man back into the house. Praise God for protecting Mike. Thank you, Lord, for sending Zion to me today.
Knowing my kids as I do, I knew she needed to hear my voice. Thirty seconds is apparently enough.
Oh Jehovah Jireh, how could I ever thank you?
My prayers continued for family and extended family of various varieties. I called my husband at our other store and we prayed in agreement for Morgan’s spiritual protection during these painful circumstances for her losing her beloved cat.
Immediate peace in my heart. The BP leveled and I know my daughter is protected.
Radiant Rebecca visited for the first time ever. Thank you, God, for supporting our business and letting us serve you! Rebecca has a 20 YO son, 15 YO daughter and 16 month baby girl. She suffered a miscarriage last month and the healthcare in the world is corrupted. It broke my heart and I sense it broke God’s too. She was so grateful for someone to just listen and receive her story without question. Doctors treated her terribly.
Talked to my daughter on the phone. What a blessed conversation.
Reasonable Randall was kind, as always. He loves our heart to take care of people.
Crowder Dillon is a Dr Pepper fan. I humbled myself and asked to confirm his name. I said, “dude, you are beyond kind and I keep wanting to call you James. Can you please remind me of your first name? He smiled a super sweet smile and said, it’s actually Dillon James. James is his middle name.
Hearing “James, James and James”. Again, repetition which now reminds me of Moses. It feels like much of what I have been taught the past week was necessary to make my testimony more mature. I stand corrected: ALL of it was necessary. Now, to pray for clarity and for my Master Editor.
Pretty Payton was thrilled to reduce her nicotine intake by 40% today with a North Pina Colada vape. Maybe I will remember our Godversation as the 3P Chat It was just bubbly sweetness and genuine gratitude pouring out of her.
Fantastic study of Zion. Yes, I text myself to keep up with the nudges. Closing our store in 13 minutes. Beyond grateful for this rainy day of All Hallows Eve. Time to clean the counters as if I am doing it for Jesus.
Thank you, Lord, for sending me in the required “refill” via Payton. I love you.
First, Sister Margie and the young man from Chattanooga. I mentioned them at the end of the last post.
Margie shared about her extensive travel challenges and joys of seeing her son, James Ezra, married after raising adult children. He has a 13 YO son at home and I found my self praying for little Ezra James, as his name is reversed. Praying for him to see God’s faithfulness. Giggling inside because “James, James and James” sounding like “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia” from the Brady Bunch.
Miss Summer visited and immediately told me I was cute today. That particular word keeps being used by many who do not know me to describe me. I was inspired to share the silliness of last Sunday at my daughter’s apartment.
Sweet Summer shared a pinch more and the Holy Spirit moved me to give her Divisible by One, Exterminate the Hate and the poems in “the stack”. She feels irredeemable (her word) and whatever it was that came out of my mouth was used to persuade her otherwise. Praise God! Oh, Jehova Jireh! The Lord WILL provide💜✝️💜
Brother Wyoming Kurt visited for third time in six days. Huge Godversation and he was vulnerable in sharing his PTSD from Desert Storm. He was proud to share his Airborne tattoo on his calf.
While he was preparing to leave pick up his autistic grandson from school, Miss Amber arrived. She has a little nugget of faith. She is an introvert but spoke so sweetly of Wyoming Kurt.
Humbled to learn so much of her story today. She is working two jobs while her partner and his kids rely on her to do what their earthly father will not. He has not worked for over six months. How I long to tell her about Haggai and rebuilding the temple…”get to work” was on my heart. I was directed to be still and listen. Thank you, Jesus, for teaching the petulant child in me obedience!
When the Holy Spirit takes over my tongue, it is always a lesson for me. Usually, it is meant for others, as well. However, there is always something for me to learn. In this case, what Mark shared last night about getting his dad to eat food was applicable to encouraging her husband to see the circumstances through his children’s eyes. He is not a person of faith from what I understand, so therefore, an example he could relate to his own life. I may not be writing where others can understand, but this is what I need to write to remember and honor the moment.
Ultimately, Amber needs to see sacrificial love, agape love, from her partner. I boldly told her that I would be praying for Shawn to be nudged into action. Despite having a tough season of circumstances at our business, I asked if I could bless her day and give her the Orange Mango and GoMax. She was beyond moved by the Holy Spirit, despite the fact she credited me. When the spirit nudges me to bless others, it’s fun to be the hands and feet of Jesus. Thank you, God, for my husband who demonstrates sacrificial love 💜✝️💜
Luxe Joe came in and immediately commented on my countenance. I couldn’t stop smiling. We had a wonderful conversation where I believe the Holy Spirit was working, as well. Joe said he has always been so comfortable in our space and he was a loyal person, regardless, but he loved our store. Some part of me needed to be reminded of our loyal customers. Mark was reminded thru Lebanon Couple and I was personally told by Joe. Thank you, Lord, for another type of generous double portion.
Texas Brenda just left. What a radiant smile! She is visiting her sick 94 (3?) YO Mom and sister. She was thrilled to learn why her disposable was not ideal for her and more. We did enjoy a blessed Godversation. At one point, we both said, “Thank you. God!”
Father God, I know all good things and good knowledge come from you. Thank you for sharpening the discernment tool in my spiritual toolbox. Thank you for blessing us so outrageously today. UNITY. AGAPE. I am listening. You are Holy, Holy, Holy and I love you. I am completely yours.
(Prayer break)
Note: we have done more business at BOTH shops in five hours than we have done on our “good” days in ten hours.
Wowza! Just as I sat down to thank God for the phenomenal day thus far, Miss Angel W calls the shop. She has been visiting our other location for months. Today, of all days, she calls to check in with me. A product was lost in shipment the past two weeks. Well, one of those box a arrived just before she called. In that one box was what she was seeking. it was the sweetest way to tell her “God loves you so much!”
It was such a bubbly Godversation. She had seen me down in my back and she asked me how I was feeling. How awesome the Holy Spirit immediately put the 8/20/24 miracle healing into an explanation she could accept. Sharing Sweet Futina and that healing with her and Brother Leon was so fun! he immediately said “Hallelujah!”
Hallelujah! just received confirmation from Summer.
Dustin and Steve visiting today was special. I had Cousin Nathalie on my heart. Dustin works for a lab and Steve at First Watch. They have been legally married eleven years. Dustin has a giant cross tattooed on his right forearm. Just noting the image for posterity because it will remind me what we discussed. We are all more similar than we are different. For example, I joked with Steve about having a younger husband. When His Timing changes our conversations to Godversation, it will be interesting to see how much God has grown me from today.
Golden Timothy visited next. I could feel a weight on him but he was on the phone. We did not have a chance to talk. I quietly went to get his Golden Tobacco juice. Notable to me, he ordered half the size he typically does. This is small for many people, but it always draws my attention. Whatever “it” may be, something is impacting finances when established habits are changed. He ordered a 60 ml bottle instead of his normal 120.
When Timothy paid, it was with a ladies debit card. I asked if it was his wife’s and he said it was his aunts. He was still on the phone and conversation was limited for efficiency. I asked him to please wait one minute.
I went to the lab and poured another 60 ml. I brought it out and just handed it to him. He told me I did not have to do that. I told him his cross speaks to me differently and sacrificial love has been a residing theme of my last week.
My son called. That entire Godversation was beautiful to me. My son demonstrated great wisdom in some scheduling choices with his dad and how he interacts with his coaches. Lord, thank you for sending Miss Bella to be a Saint. Thank you for preparing her via her Nurse Mom to be empathetic toward GA coaches. Thank you for my wonderful son and his sweet heart describing Bella’s mom, Kim. Praise and more praise. Never enough! I told my son I had specific prayers for him last Monday and he just confirmed many of them were answered. Specific opportunities were added and specific obstacles subtracted. Between that and Morgan currently reading The Five People you meet in Heaven …I believe all those prayers will be answered in His Timing. 💜✝️💜
A new customer entered and typically I would immediately get off the phone. His name is Beaux. Not today, Satan! The answer was to let him know I was sorry for being on the phone, it was not my habit. I explained we had been struggling to get time on the phone with my son. Blake told me to put the phone down and he could wait the one minute it would take.
Shaggy Beaux is endearing in spirit. He told me “No! I think it is so CUTE how you want to talk to him. It is precious. Yessir, I see what you did there!
Sweet Summer returned after she ended work at five. She returned the stack of old writings to me and was truly impacted by the day. She hugged me three times. She said I was a Godsend. We shared more between us. I shared my Godroom post today with her. I prayed over her one near the table over specific issues and again before she left, right at the front door. Since she knew what was on this post today, she knew my day began praying at that very door.
Yes, Lord, the door is wide open.
Spunky Samantha shared her story. Her husband of 19 years left her last year. She had used grandfathers inheritance to pay off their family home. She must now refinance and give her husband half the equity. She is strong in her faith at Life Point Riverdale. Before knowing she had such deep faith, I shared the “ Seek Sunshine” story. We enjoyed a beautiful Godversation. She changed before my eyes from “down and out” to “smiling with light in her eyes”. I know what I saw was the Holy Spirit nudging her heart to accept unconditional love from me, a stranger.
Couldn’t let her pay for that purchase. When God is blessing us like there is no tomorrow, I trust that nudge implicitly.
Praise God, my loving husband returned home last night. It was a glorious Sunday from beginning to end. I wrote in my gray leather journal for posterity. The notes are clear enough to write the detailed testimony.
Insert giggle here. Anyone who knows me in the flesh understands I exclude “cheerleader energy”. I am being nudged to see the power of the Holy Spirit from a different perspective. Yes, Jesus can and will sit you down and just set you straight. The theme this year has in great part been to SLOW DOWN.
For now, I welcome anyone who ever sees this humble post to our Smyrna Tn store. We have prayed over this space countless times..,before we even got the keys and the six years since. Today was different.
Praise God. First two customers were Miss Margie and a gentleman wearing this shirt! More sales in first half hour than we typically see by 1 pm. I credit the One True God for blessing us so quickly this morning.
Thank you, God. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Holy Spirit.
My Jesus has the best sense of humor. This morning was glorious, waking with “wee hours” in my heart. Like every other word on my heart, at any time, I go straight to the “wee hour in the Bible” search. I learned exponentially more than I could have imagined. I sent one of the best articles to Joyce, as she is the first person on my heart when I read or hear the word “watchman”. This is to be the placemark and reminder to delve deeper in the future.
Immediately upon opening the store, I attempted to record my revised testimony. It should be noted, bubbling over with the Holy Spirit does not always make for good video. For one thing, the Holy Spirit will shut my mouth, and the expressions are not particularly pleasant. Add tears and perhaps you get a glimpse of why the videos are distracting. However, I learned several things which are meant to be included. How? When I become THAT verklempt, it is because it is so deeply entrenched in my heart. The Holy Spirit will literally squeeze every drop of love out of me.
The word verklempt is not in the Bible. However, I was directed to search CLAMPS and was directed to 1 Chron 22:3 where David provided iron for the clamps and nails needed for the gates and doors. Just prior to this, I read The Holy Spirit and Hinges (Acts 2:1-13). Yes, indeed, the Holy Spirit is my hinge pin and keeps the door open to Jesus and God. The door is wide open today.
The reason I have been redirected here instead of working on the ever-growing testimony is to share how that open door is represented by the door to my shop every day. No matter who walks in, I strive to see the Jesus in them. We have lots of Godversations in this little vape shop. Many customers/friends know there is scripture under these floors and behind the walls. This business belongs to God.
On this incredibly rainy day, our Kentucky 500 customers visit me. Back in July, I heard the heartbreaking loss of their sister-in-law. The wife’s brother was truly in despair. Ever since, I tend to pray for them all whenever I see the husband or wife from our Kentucky 500 customers. Today, the wife was in for the first time in two months. I asked her how her brother was doing and learned he was remarried! Bottom line, it sounded like God put the exact childhood friend in the widower’s life to bring him back into the land of the truly living.
At the tail end of that Godversation, Nissan Scott was paying close attention. After the couple left, Scott share with me about how his brother was very much in a similar situation. In his case, his best friend had died, leaving a widow and two children. His brother married his best friend’s widow, and they have been blessed with thirty years together. Interesting factoid: I have had Godversations many times with Scott’s partner, Karen. Today was the first real Godversation with him.
The next customer in the door listened to the last of my conversation with Nissan Scott. He opened the Godversation by telling me what he gathered from Nissan Scott’s story. I said something to the effect of God having his His Hand on all of it. He was so incredibly kind and complementary when he said, “You sound like my mother!” It was truly kind. Extemporaneously, he shares the nutshell of his life story. He was born and raised in Franklin, TN, developed a struggle with alcohol and chose to move to Murfreesboro to change his life. Just last week, he was dismissed from his management job. The following day, he got a job which uses all of his skills, without the management title, for the same money. His mom essentially told him, “Scott, this is proof God has your back.” We enjoyed an extensive Godversation and the Holy Spirit told me to write it down with “GREAT SCOTTS”. It thrills my ever-loving heart to hear that I am like anyone else who reminds people that God has their back! Thank you, Lord!
Yes, I googled and there is no mention of Great Scotts in the Bible. However, the Oxford Dictionary of English calls it a “dated” euphemism for “GREAT GOD!” YESSIR! I see exactly what He did there, too.
As if this were not enough, two more extensive Godversations ensued with Pickle Ball Kenny and Star Wars Patrick. I met both through Hope Fellowship more than a decade ago. When Kenny talked about the pickleball community and how they WELCOME ALL, I told him they modeled a biblical church. Being truly connected to others connects us to God. Also, the Edwards Clan will forever be in my prayers with any Star Wars reference. Patrick told me they were just thinking about our family on the way to the store today. Godwinks galore! To be extra clear, we have been open 3.3 hours, it’s 1:22 at this moment. I am here until 8 pm tonight.
Good Lord, thank you for ALL of it today. I am overwhelmed by your love pouring out. Please help me continue to represent Jesus to the best of my ability today. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Floodgates. It is now 1:51 and Michigan Jake just left the store. What began as a conversation about whether or not he was from Chicago grew into the most powerful presence of the Holy Spirit today. I learned he is in a difficult season of marital separation and is father to three young kids. I encouraged him to consider less nicotine when I learned he never smoked before. I was nudged to bless him with a SidePiece with 60 percent less nicotine. He was moved and shared he feels like God keeps reaching out to him. I confirmed if he feels like God is reaching out, it is because that is very much what He does! Prayers followed with encouragement to read Hosea and keep asking the Holy Spirit to reveal why the message is for him. So many tears and not all of them flowed from my eyes. I am excited for that Godversation to continue.
Filled up. Poured out. Repeat.
The heart of the day is all about Jesus. I am so blessed to carry the heart of this day into writing the Growing Testimony.
You alone are Holy, Holy, Holy. You have had this simple incantation in my heart with every variation of punctuation possible the past six weeks. I could never thank you enough for all you have done, all you are currently doing and all you will surely do in my life. You know I treasure your promises and how grateful I am for all your provision. While I have struggled to write “the letter”, you have grown me exponentially through this process since Labor Day. Silly me, you revealed a beautiful list of 55 big things you have done in my life in January. While I have written many of those detailed stories for the sake of posterity, I do not have one simple document outlining my personal testimony. Please help me share the biggest pieces in such a way that your hand on my life is evident. I ask this in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Today is October 21, 2024; I am currently 56 years old. To say the past few years of my life have been supercharged with spiritual growth and experiences would be a massive understatement. It takes my breath to consider all that God has done for me, through me, and with me my entire life. However, those words are especially true since a near-death experience two and a half years ago. This entire year is filled with writing out so very many different details and miracles. How could I NOT be overwhelmed with praise and gratitude?
Thank you, God, for getting Miss Dottie into the store today to share her testimony. The value of five minutes and her life are evident in her joy from you. I love, love, LOVE thow you timed her season of growth from her NDE July 3, 2016, with how you were moving in my own life at that time. I just love how fond you seem to be of giving me dates that are easy to remember…so I will not forget your hand in all of it.
Thank you, Lord, for what you have been teaching me today. As I sit at the shop and Mark supports Blake by being at the Tennessee Tech Football game, I am still in awe. Until last year, this was always the date I joyfully celebrated for my childhood best friend, Angie’s birthday. Exactly one year ago, we were in Florence, Italy, on this date. It is a significant date and experience, no doubt. However, this extends beyond having the scripture by the passports, the envelopes and even our glorious evening with Bryan Yates.
Yessir. I think I see exactly what you did there. You had me completely poured out, filled up and poured out again, daily. This morning, this day was given a new context. While I didn’t fail to acknowledge you each day, it was this particular day I spelled it out from my heart. Your heart. From the moment I declared my real treasure and source of humor, God continued to show up in even bigger and more ostentatious ways. Praise is absolutely the best weapon, combined with the Word.
Because I had so many words about it last year on Facebook, I am copying over here for posterity.
Today has been more than words could ever express. Uploaded reels or clips to share moments- beauty and grace. Either you get it or you don’t. Praying you do.
…
That was all I had written before going to sleep four hours ago. Our day was so intense and emotionally exhausting…I was done. Spent. Poured out. Full. Overwhelmed.
Once again, I am being pulled from much needed sleep to write something down. Life theme. Gal 6:7-9 He showed me. Bloom where planted and what He planted in me. Life verse. GAL 6:9 for a Blonde Polish Chick is hilarious. Don’t forget, God gave you your sense of humor!!!
Did you see the thieves left our passports by His Word? Our Father in Heaven will NOT be mocked. Mark probably worried a pinch when I fell on the bed laughing so hard tears came from my eyes. Then again, I told Mark in February that God wanted to show him something in Italy. Not even joking
Seriously, I was in Blue Ridge, GA, the first few days of February. All I can say is THE most powerful presence of the Holy Spirit I have known in 55 years came upon me in a way which exceeds words. Asbury didn’t surprise me in the least. Not much does. I have always loved when He shows up and shows off! I get like a CHILD when I see it and giddy to share with anyone on my path.
I am made “like this” for His purposes. Please Forgive me if it hurts or offends in any way. It’s not about you or whether or not we believe the same things. I love you. I am just more concerned about pleasing God than people.
When I moved the dress to start cleaning up after the robbery, I wasn’t surprised at all to see our passports next to scripture cards. Mark didn’t know I had been led to write down a verse for each day in Italy. I laughed HARD.
After most was cleaned up, I found Two envelopes in separate (weird) places. One from the bank devoid of cash. One from our home where I had stored my Bible verses, a few blanks and a writing tool. The envelopes looked alike. Folded at the third. Two types of treasure, my friends. We have the One that really matters. So, within a few hours of being robbed, we were both joyfully hiking up to a stunning sunset.
If you claim to rely on His Word, I just want to encourage you to invite Him into even more of your lives. He wants me a to be like children he wants us to share His goodness in some way, EVERY SINGLE DAY…. praying you ask yourselves what are YOU bringing to that relationship? This is the third time #QOTD messaging with images are being put on my heart.
Okay. Now I am looking at the clock and Whatever He shows me 7 years from today …can’t imagine. Many of you know that things I wrote years ago are playing out in an almost freaky way. To highlight day 8, God is on the move. Confirmations galore. Grateful we got robbed! Not kidding!
1)Didn’t wear face make up to see David yesterday. Kind of like, “you are naked, so I will go the ONLY way of naked possible for me”. . The Experience at Accademia was intense for both of us in different ways. Beautiful. Cathartic tears. Lots of them for me.
Edit: Need to note it took from 3:17-5:30 or so to write this. I went to read to ensure no egregious typos. The bit above said LORD OF THEM. Accurate, but still , GODWINK. Mary Kathleen Morlan
2)Sammies sent to friends – we love Terri and Jason and and our whole small group back home. We were talking about them at the Leather School- as well as Brian Sweatt and OC.
3)Bryan Yates of Liverpool, England: Thank you for sharing your musicianship before the sunset. Thank you for also breaking bread and drinking a glass of wine with us (and the gelato, too) with us later. Truly, you are a treasure. Whenever you get access again to the book of faces , grateful to have some way to connect. Excited to hear if you meet Josie & Mimmo. I trust the day you read this will be exactly as designed. We truly loved our evening with you!
My favorite helper likes to wake me in the wee hours for one on one time. God has a Divine sense of humor, no doubt.
In February, my blood pressure tanked quickly and we struggled with getting back to normal” for about six weeks. For being a “Go Go Gadget” type of human, my get up and go had very much got up and went.
During that time, our Bible Study group was working through Robert Morris’ More than Words Series. My husband could not attend one night and I drove myself. Softly. Quietly. Peacefully.
As I pulled into their driveway, the “boom” of Crowder playing Graverobber blasted from my radio. As much as I wanted to attend peace-filled, I was compelled to sit in my car rocking out until the song was over! Then, I prayed again for one mouth and two ears before entering. Always want to honor God and my husband, too.
I took a brand new journal that evening which has a midnight butterfly on it. Despite my desire to keep my mouth shut, I was compelled to encourage everyone to write down God stories we can share. After we finished, I shared with two of the women about hearing that song in the driveway. Raucous laughter, dance and praise in the kitchen ensued as I played the song for them.
The next morning, I flipped to Isa 63:7. Short on time to study, I googled for an image to center my day when I arrived to work. Psalm 63:7 was returned to me with an image of a midnight butterfly. Oh, The Lord had a Word for me!
Days later, the Holy Spirit infused enough energy to write it all out. As I checked my notes from the group study, “the Word Healed” jumped off the page. Period. The word “healed” was underlined. Psalm 107:20.
Opening my Bible to study that verse deeper, I see that it concludes with being robbed…from the grave. I see what He did there…but needed to confirm Pastor Morris had never spoke the rest of the verse. Easily confirmed checking the transcript from the video.💜✝️💜
This morning, the Lord has me in the 55th chapters of Isaiah and Psalms. So much being revealed is overwhelming, yet beautiful. For whatever His reason, I am to share.
I “met” Robert Morris sometime before Miles McPherson taught at Gateway about Satanic Agreements in 2015.
Did you attend Clarksville, TN Immaculate Conception back in the 80’s or 90’s? Even if you did not attend Mass there, it’s entirely possible many of you remember Father Robert J Roeser, aka “Father Bob. One of my fondest memories is a conversation we had at the Old Joe B’s, in downtown Clarksville in the very early 1990’s. Yes, it was a bar and restaurant. I would occasionally meet my parents there on a Friday night, as they winded down their week.
Context matters. I was not in church on a regular basis between 1987 and 1995. I was raped by three APSU Baseball players in March 1987. At the time, I was responsible for President Robert O. Riggs‘ children whenever he and his wife were away on weekends. Sadly, he voiced concern for “the young woman” and was relieved of his position shortly after serving as the 11th President of APSU for 11 years.
Some old memories began to percolate this morning and those memories clarify, somewhat, why my “season of separation” extended over seven years.
By August 1995, I was living on Blair Blvd in Nashville. I was still volunteering at RSAC in Nashville, the Rape and Sexual Abuse Center. For 24 consecutive hours every weekend, I would soberly take calls from all kinds of beautiful humans. Normally, I would get home from work around 6 on a Friday and continue until 6 on a Saturday Night. Most of the victims I spoke with had been sexually abused in egregious ways, many by their own families. It was a very dark season, with only pinches of light. The other 24 hours, I was most often not sober. In truth, I would drink so much alcohol that I would occasionally black out. It was not a good time. It was more than half my lifetime ago. I was only 27.
I am not sure if it was August 13 or August 20, 1995. All I know is for the first time in more than seven years, I woke up with the compulsion to get myself to church. The closest church to my old apartment was Christ the King Catholic Church at 3001 Belmont Blvd. I can still sense the cold of the marble entry. I remember how my heart was racing as I kneeled, “crossed myself” and took my seat 2/3 back on the right- hand side. This was over 28 years ago!
I opened the bulletin for the day and reacquainted myself with the order of Mass. On the right-hand side, there was notification that Father Bob had passed away on August 12, 1995. He had an aneurism on Saturday the 12th, as he prepared his sermon for Sunday at St. Catherines in Columbia, TN.
My heart tells me it was August 13. Otherwise, why would it have impacted me so clearly? Still, it COULD have been August 20, which happens to be the day my daddy passed away 14 years later. I called Christ the King and spoke to someone who is going to dig for old bulletins. Part of me recalls being shocked he had died within 24 hours of me getting back into church. Part of me wonders if my memory is playing a trick on me.
I also looked up Char Creson, who I remember working with at RSAC in 1995. As it turns out she still works for the same center, under a new name, Sexual Assault Center. I am not surprised the new logo is purple with a prominent “yellow sunshine” symbol. Oh, the sunshine symbolism which followed years to come!
By the summer of 1996, I was attending our Ten-Year High School Reunion for NEHS. It was at that reunion my relationship with the father of my children began. In 1997, we completed marriage counseling with Father James K Mallet. In April 1998, he married us at Christ the King Catholic Church. It is truly mind-numbing. In this moment, I realize I have my two amazing kiddos because HE brought me to church the day after Father Bob went to heaven.
Christ is King. In this moment, I am still feeling that worn cushion underneath my knees.
Thank you, Lord, for the answered prayers with Pammie Sue this week for her brother, Kevin, as well as our customers/friends Jose and Sam. I am beyond grateful for your hand on Baby Malachi’s heart surgery, too! THANK YOU! I love the way you show up and show off when we invite you into our daily lives. I know you know exactly what I need for your purposes…so I am asking for more of you and less of me in the process. In the name of your son, Jesus, and every drop of blood shed for us, I ask for your will to be clear. Amen.
, grateful to have some way to connect. Excited to hear if you meet Josie & Mimmo. I trust the day you read this will be exactly as designed. We truly loved our evening with you!
My God Room 